1m2aSandbox

Maddie has taken pretend mothering to a
whole new level, and I’m not sure where all this will end.


In addition to all the other things she does for Elmo, Maddie now
has an exact replica of her own nighttime routine that she
steadfastly performs for him. I mean, she’s always put her
dolls and Elmos to bed, in a sort of, “Here you go Elmo! Time
to get in your cradle! Here’s the covers! Night Night!”
kind of way. But over the past few days she’s been intensely
interested in making it as exactly like her own routine as
possible

A few days ago I was working in the
kitchen. Cora was grooving in the bouncy seat while Maddie
“cooked” in her own kitchen, and after several moments
Cora became restless and started whimpering. In the midst of
cutting up raw chicken, I opted not to touch her and began singing
soothingly to her, a trick that sometimes works. Hearing the music,
Maddie came into the kitchen to investigate.


“Why are you singing like that, Mom?” she asked.
We’re a big music household so there’s often someone
singing, but she was curious why I was singing a lullaby softly.


“Well kiddo, sometimes when Cora gets fussy, she feels better
if someone sings a soft song to her. Babies can often calm down
with a quiet, pretty tune.” Satisfied with the answer, Maddie
went back to her own play.

Cora is four and a half months now, and is
driving me crazy with the sleep thing.


I know that every kid is different, and you should never compare,
but Maddie was sleeping nine or ten hours at a stretch by this
time, nursing, and going back to sleep for another three.
She’d go through these phases when she hit developmental
growth spurts where she’d wake up a couple times a night for
a month or so, then settle back down again.


Cora, on the other hand, has yet to sleep through the night.

Maddie’s in the midst of a bad patch
discipline-wise; she seems to have a mini- (or maxi-) meltdown
several times a day. We’ve got a “routine” down
for handling the blowups, which is good, since we get plenty of
opportunities to practice it. I think the world’s a tough
place for her right now: she’s incredibly bright and is
learning at an astonishing pace, and sometimes it’s hard to
keep up with everything she’s being bombarded with. Feelings,
emotions, the appropriate way to express them, are all hard to get
under her own control and channel responsibly. I can’t
imagine what it must be like to be learning how to handle yourself
and function in society while still trying to make sense of your
own tiny day-to-day world.


But Maddie’s in luck – she’s not the only one
learning something valuable through all of this. Mommy and Daddy
are having to work something new into their emotional repertoire,
as well – instant forgiveness.

One of the benefits of blogging is that
it’s an easy way for family members to keep up with you;
rather than having to find time for a decent phone chat while kids
clamor for your attention, you can simply keep relatives updated
via the Internet on your child’s daily life. And for their
part, relatives are allowed a daily glimpse into a long-distance
life of a loved one, permitting them to feel that they’re not
totally missing out on everything.


So it’s no surprise to me that many of Maddie and
Cora’s grandparents read this daily (hi, y’all). And
last week one set of grandparents enjoyed my story of Maddie riding
her “borrowed” tricycle in Target so much that they
were moved to action.

Since the US Department of Health and
Human Services has declared October 1 to be “National Child
Health Day”, I thought I’d take the day to mention one
of my favorite websites – href="http://healthychild.org">Healthy Child Healthy
World.


Let’s face it – we’re not living in the same
world we grew up in. I’m not one of those people that long
for the good ole days when we didn’t have to use seatbelts,
much less car seats. Kids today stand a better chance of surviving
a car crash, avoiding SIDS, and skipping the lead paint snacks. At
the same time, our environment is more crowded with pollutants and
toxins than ever before; new plastics and chemicals not tested on
kids are making their way into our mainstream life in the shape of
toys, cleaners, and even furniture; and even as we come up with
anti-bacterial soap, bacteria come up with a way to be resistant to
it.

Maddie’s long had an independent
streak in her: as soon as she could walk, it was her preferred
method of transportation, and she’d eschew the stroller
whenever possible, her chubby little 14-month-old legs doing the
two-mile-roundtrip walk to the park with determination. I barely
had to show her how to hold a spoon before she was completely
feeding herself, so it’s no surprise that she hates to have
someone else brush her teeth for her, even though she still
hasn’t gotten it quite right.


I’ve long admired this independence (can’t imagine
where she gets it) and have even encouraged it, since the more she
does the less Mommy has to do. Hi, I’m Jennifer and I’m
lazy – remember me? But the more refined her motor skills
get, the more tasks she wants to take upon herself, and the longer
these tasks take.


Which makes Mommy’s life, um, less easy.